Stardust--Neil Gaiman

I'm taking a stand here: I don't like Neil Gaimen.

I hear the gasps already. But, but, but......he's so cool! He grows heirloom vegs in the wilds of small town Minnesota! He's a classic in his field! So imaginative! So dark yet affirming! What is wrong with you, Kerry?!!!!

I agree--I should like Neil Gaimen. He is very imaginative. I usually adore fantasy that comes out of modern times and dilemmas, and mixes it up with classic themes and a dash of style. And it's not too high fantasy, which is an automatic turnoff for me. And I see in his writing all of the technical reasons I should love it--it's clear but detailed, smart and funny.

But Stardust exemplifies exactly what leaves me cold and disinterested--there's no characters. There's a story, and some plot and some archetypes moving within it. But there's no soul, no emotional connection.

And if you can't figure out by the start of Chapter Four exactly what's what and who's who, then there's no hope for you because it is painfully clear what the script is.

And before your conclusion is that I have just not read enough Neil Gaimen, I'll list out what I've read:

• Mr. Punch
  
• The first five books of Sandman
• part of Neverwhere
• part of American Gods
• Stardust

And I've liked what's been done to his ideas by other writers, namely Bill Willingham and Jill Thompson (Dead Boy Detectives only).

I don't think it's me.

Your Outta Control Cat--Christine Church

This is actually a pretty good book, best given to a new cat owner who is unfamiliar with cat behavior. It explains that most cat behavior is not due to any desire on to manipulate, annoy or boss the owner but just the cat's way of responding to environment and doing its natural cat thing. Catbox and aggression issues are covered extensively, as well as how to retrain your cat and teach it acceptable behavior. Surprise! It's the same stuff Supernanny teaches! Have a schedule, be firm and consistant, get down to the cat's level and think like him. Use positive reinforcement.

It didn't cover our issues, which are currently

• Fatty cat/thin cat
• Stealing human food
• Chewing on cardboard

Ah, well. My boys are special.

The book also features tons of adorable cat pics.

Is It Sad To Be Getting Guidance From.....

the comics page? Particularly the strip Mary Worth? Which is so long-running and ancient it seems embalmed?

Well, I must confess. I started following it a few months ago, hooked on Anna's discovery of her pregnancy and her resulting joy (she'd been married before, but perhaps her husband was the one who was sterile!) and the conversation that developed between her and her husband Brian. They discussed the problems their relationship had hit--not talking about their fears, false intimacy, the "it's my fault" game--and vowed to change and move forward. It was exhilarating, because you so seldom see such discussions in any media.

It was a great example of teaching (okay, maybe it was a little preachy) through narrative, and a reminder to readers of the basics of relationships and the importance of communication. Compared to that sucky strip Funky Winkerbean, which wants to teach but takes the easy way out and turns everything into an Issue, it was wonderful and I was over the moon.

Now that Mary has somehow gotten herself latched onto by a wacko deadbeat with issues up the wazoo, I wonder what's next.

And I even liked this quote "It's never wrong to be lighthearted! Because you never know what challenges are around the corner!"

Just call me "Granny Kerry." And fetch me a beer and my cigarettes, because my stories are on!