Saturday, May 03, 2008

Is It Too Much To Hope They Burn Down My House?

Good god, I am going to miss the neighbors and their hijinks and the chance to bitch once I move. The Marlboro Mesa does not seem to have as much wacky going on within its borders. And I do worry that I won't have as much crazy surrounding me and I'll get bored.

Their new kick is apparently setting fires in the backyard. No really, they were hanging out in the backyard around a little campfire the other night. No rocks to create a border for the fire, and now they have a little burned circle about 3 feet in diameter in their backyard. How incredibly attractive. I saw it smoldering when I got up in the morning. At first I wondered if it was perhaps a compost pile. Blah, blah, camping, fire safety and all that, but this is a suburb. A densely packed suburb. I don't care how experienced you are, it strikes me as a bit dangerous. Anyone else?

Dear performance artists--

If you burn down both our houses, I promise I'll go in with you and we can sell our lots to a developer, if they even exist any more.

Or at least, can you please get so drunk you burn down my garage?



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