Monday, November 17, 2008

In Which I Attempt To Restrain My Breasts In A Socially Acceptable Manner

So I thought that based on the combination of me, my 38DD chest and the difficulties of shopping for "foundation garments that deal with one's upper parts" as DrWende* puts it, I'd have some sort of hilarious story involving my personal humiliation. Alas, there is no story. Based on an ad in O, I went to Wal-Mart in search of Curvation bras. They had 3 styles in my size; 1 fit and was workable although I never thought I'd be buying a cotton, non-underwire bra. If it holds up (ha ha, bad pun) to wear I'll be really surprised, but for $13 it was worth trying.

Yes, I am a good thinking liberal intellectual who otherwise wouldn't be caught dead in a Wal-Mart. But I also have a complex financial life involving an Excel spreadsheet.

Next month I'll stop by CC's Lingerie for what I think of as "real bras"--the cantilevered, structurally complex, modest and boring bras I usually have to buy. Victoria's Secret is a place I'd venture only if I really, really, really couldn't make myself feel bad without the help of others, and Lane Bryant has pretty larger size bras but annoys me more than Wal-Mart. Yes, truly.

*This is right up there with use of the term "dress enhancer" as the heroine of The Shadow And The Star phrases it, a term that should be modified for current garments and readopted. Oh, and Wende, bad nylon slips are available at both Target and Wal-Mart; nicer versions are found online at VS.


drwende said...

Never go into a VS store -- they're happy to sell to women over age 24 in the catalog, but they despise us in the person.

No way, no how, will I wear a slip, no matter how trendy. Even J.C. Penney sells lined skirts these days.

Genevieve said...

I've said it before, and I will say it again - get a fitting! I learned that I am not a 36D but a 32F, and that 80% of women wear the wrong size. It was a life changing experience - no joke!

I went to a place called Intimacy (which has also been on Oprah), but most of the old fashioned department stores have fitters. (I know Nordstroms has a good rep, but I have no idea what department stores they have in AZ).

VS is awful - they try to tell you that you are a different size so you will buy something they stock. And the sales girls are nasty too. I only buy their cotton panties from the website when they have the big sales.

drwende said...

I was about to add, don't ever get a fitting at Mervyn's, but they're BELLY UP so it doesn't matter.

Gal there tried to fit me into a B cup. No, uh, the cup is supposed to, uh, HOLD the contents without creating bulgy overflow. If I want more cleavage, that's why god in her infinite wisdom created the Wonder Bra; I will NOT achieve it by sectioning the existing bosomry into the appearance of four mammaries. I am not a cow.

Kerry said...

Genevieve, I got a fitting last year, and I haven't done anything radical weight-wise! That's how I got the 38DD confirmation. And this is a good bra--no top bulges, no side bulges, the support definately comes from the band and not the straps, and no back fat piles. I'm good.

I like slips, and Wende, I was reminded of your post last summer on the WSJ article how women don't wear slips anymore. VS slips are like looking at the Anthropologie site for aprons--uberfeminity that sucks you into dream world.

lsaspacey said...

I agree with the VS store statements. Don't go. They are actually told not to stock a lot of the bras for larger-breasted women. It seems they don't want them in the store. This is what a friend with a larger cup size found out through research. However, there is definitely more variety and size choices in the catalogs and online.

Genevieve said...

Somehow I must have forgotten you telling me that - I am a bad friend! I am also jealous that you can still shop in normal stores while I am left to specialty lingerie stores and ordering online and returning what doesn't fit. Good luck with the button ups! I've found ones that are cut kind of A-line and have a little stretch work best.