Wednesday, July 09, 2008

Down Where The Drunkards Roll

I love my family, but my word. I average about 1 drink a month, with all sorts of rules. No drinking in the middle of the day. No drinking away bad feelings. No drinking alone. No drinking in bars alone (yes, I saw The Accused at an early age). Stay away from drunk people. I'm wired for problems, so this is how I protect myself. I also don't like beer or most wine, and only care for mixed drinks and cider. So keeping my tastes expensive and hard to fulfill is another good way to keep myself sober.

Oh, except that I have the same emotional difficulties drinking usually covers up but I use other behaviors that don't necessarily raise a red flag--the eating, the impulsive buying, burying my head in reading, isolation, obsessions, paralysis.

It's shitty being high-functioning. I kind of wish I could just develop a drinking problem because people notice that and it has a set path of treatment. But no, I don't like the simple, do I? I like the long cut.

Oh, well.

First it was the $8 a bottle Whole Foods sangria my mom and I discovered. In the 3 weeks I was in NJ, we polished off 3 bottles together. It's really good--I have fond memories of sangria from my teen years when my parents had a 70's revival and started making sangria and would let us have some. Sangria=wine and fruit salad. How can you resist?

Now Dusie has taken up drinking again--she gave it up 6 years ago when she quit smoking, but the current c&w songness of our lives has taken a bit of a toll. That and the pool being green (it's now blue, and did not crack on my watch). The official drink of The Marlboro Mesa is Planter's Punch.

Dusie Makes Some Planter's Punch

Take a tumbler and put 3-4 ice cubes in it. Pour in a 1-2 fingers of Bacardi Coconut Rum. Top with orange juice. Float grenadine on top, and watch it sink and look all pretty like a sunset.

Voila! Perfect every time. She drinks these because she says it brings back fond memories of the epic gambling trip she and The Don took to Puerto Rico when she was 18, when he used her powers as a craps virgin for profit, and let her have a pre-dinner drink. She was such a lightweight she was stumbling on the sidewalk. Honestly, I think that it's sort of sweet. I'm a little envious.

If I had any reservations about Arizona being the promised land, they were allayed when I learned of the existence of the BevMo!. The BevMo! (the exclamation point is part of the name) is a liquor superstore, but better than any Spirits or Buy-Rite I've ever been in. First off, it's really big and bright and clean. I was awed by the selection, especially the rotating stand of 50 types of liquor, all in little airplane bottles and priced from $2-5. They had Pimm's! And Babycham! Who can resist "The Happiest Drink In The World?" And the artwork!

That's not all--they have a shopper's card. For every $250 you spend, you get 5% off your next purchase. Pitiful, I know, but a stroke of brilliance in my opinion.

I predict a fall, but it will be a fun tumble.


Camilla said...

I totally want some of that Babycham.

Also, I would like to clarify that while there is a set path of treatment for alcoholism, it involves Jesus and a lot of corny hand-holding. So the long cut is probably a much, much better option. =)

Kerry said...

I haven't even tried the Babycham yet. I think I'll break it out next Tuesday as I flay myself after the interview.

Yeah, I know. Jesus and handholding would send me over the edge. I'm still traumatized by the bank's attempt to induct me into a cult.